I don’t have anything against anyone for their race, size, sexual orientation, sex, hair, etc. I do however have a great distaste for stupid people. The stupid people in this tale just happen to be French. Don’t jump to conclusions! I’m not labeling French people in general as dumb-asses, just the ones Crystal and I encountered last night.
So there we were in all our us-like glory hanging out. 3-D glasses strapped on and ready for an awesome movie night in the park. They had a huge screen, a great location, and plenty of refreshments and snacks to go around. This is gearing up to be another awesome night in the lives of us. An awesome night indeed, with my love, but then… the French happened!
Now let me denounce any speculation of me having anything against the French. I love French fries, mustard, and I loves crepes, or as we saw in America – creeps. Wait those are two different things? What the…
Anyway, point is, the French pissed us off last night. First, we’re sitting on the grass just waiting for the movie to get started. It’s still about an hour to show time but we’re just hanging out doing the things we like to do like get blades of grass shoved up our noses to see our reactions (yes, we really did this and it was hilarious!). But all good things must come to an end. This end was provided by, you guessed it, THE FRENCH!
Some dude comes and sits right next to me. Right next to me! The entire world knows I hate people who don’t know how to respect my buffer zone. He’s basically on my lap with those fucking hammers he calls toes leaning over his flip flops. So I start mouthing off, but we scoot over some, we let it go.
Then Crystal smells it. That smell. Cigarettes. Pause! There are little kids running around this spot rampant. Why are you smoking in the middle of fucking families?! Some rude French broad is sitting there chain smoking, while taking pictures and showing that her panties can crawl up out of her pants when she bends down.
There were more shananigans, but you know I hate putting people to sleep with long posts. But the point is, French people, at least the ones that were there at the movie showing, need to get some fucking manners or one day someone will hand them a good ol’ American ass kicking.