So many words. Not enough paper in this world. Don't hurt the trees over me.

Born Profiler

I always question whether or not I’m a born profiler. I feel like it’s all I do. My friends all come to me when they have issues because they basically come to me with a grocery list of issues and traits, and five minutes later they look at me as if I grew up with the person. I find it incredibly awesome to be able to do this. I love looking at people, judging their moves, and coming up with things they would like to deny but don’t because they’re too busy going, “How the hell does he know that? That’s not true. Right?”

It’s come to my attention that when you have to ask yourself if something about you is right… it usually is.

I hope to grow into an awesome profiler. I do it enough to my friends and they don’t even know it. I watch every move, every little subtle detail. Not how they walk or anything like that. But what makes their tone change, how much they use their hands, what offends them. I have all the surface knowledge and a bit of the in depth stuff, but I want to be king. You know, full crown and that velvet cape so I can walk around naked and use it as a robe whenever the peasants stroll by. Either that or wait until they get close and flash them.

Anyway, I’m on the ridiculous hunt for the ultimate psychologically sexy-amazing-funktastic book to read between semesters. I always wonder whose mind I can blow into 20,000 bits of confetti. I want to profile Oprah. I want to find what makes her tick. Or Lady Gaga. I would love to profile Gaga. I think that would be an adventure into the normal human mind since everyone else spends so much time hiding what makes them weird.

But what about me? Can I profile me? Can I stand in the mirror and tell me things I never knew about me? Would that blow MY mind into confetti? Will I not trust me? Will I find me to not be the nice guy me believes me is? Will I continue to sound like cookie monster? These and other questions will be answered at some point I hope. But until then, I think I’ll just settle for brushing up on my profiling and psychological mind fucking. It might pay off in the coming years ;). Criminal minds may be more than just a show to me. We shall see :D. Thanks for listening, blog. You never talk back but damn you’re hot!


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